Let boys do boy things and girls do girl things. Want to know why the world is falling apart? It’s because liberals are turning boys into girlies with their namby-pamby ways. Face up to the real horrors of the world.ġ1 Do not bother children while they are skateboarding This is the rule that’s the real catnip for right-wingers everywhere. I’m here to make you feel Better about Yourself by telling you things you already know in a way that makes you feel clever.ġ0 Be precise in your speech Confront the chaos of Being. Certainly better than you.ġ2 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos, by Jordan B Peterson (Allen Lane £20)ĩ Assume the person you are listening to knows something you don’t Just shut up, quit moaning and listen to me. By telling you the Truth about this, I am an Improved Being. Or at least don’t lie To be honest, I’m scrabbling around for thingsbut my publishers tell me I need 12. So quit looking for short cuts and start reading Nietzsche.Ĩ Tell the truth. So stop moaning if someone is richer and better looking than you.ħ Pursue what is meaningful, not what is expedient Life is suffering. Yes, Abel was a schmuck who deserved to die and Cain wasn’t quite as goddamn perfect as he thought he was. And slap them if necessary – don’t listen to what the lefties say.Ħ Set your house in order before you criticise the world Remember the story of Cain and Abel? Well, read it then. They need Discipline if they are going to grow up to be even vaguely worthwhile humans. There, you feel marginally less useless already.ĥ Do not let your children do anything that makes you dislike them Remember that children are born with Original Sin and have a huge capacity for Evil. Atheists are merely people who are blinded to the true way of Being. They are nothing to do with the Divine Purpose.Ĥ Compare yourself to who you were yesterday, not the useless person you are today Face it, you’re never going to be that smart, so don’t compare yourself to someone who is. If people are determined to screw up, let them. They are merely exploiting the willingness of good people to help them and, as Dostoyevsky rightly observes, will drag you down to their level. Stop waiting for other people to dig you out of your pitiful hole.ģ Befriend people who want the best for you We are all Being. Yes, you have a shameful, sinful nature but for God’s sake just make a bit of an effort. You can either seek Heaven or be dragged down into Hell. Not everyone can be as rich and successful as me, but try to be less of a failure than you already are.Ģ Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping The story of the Garden of Eden shows that we are all touched with Original Sin But you have a choice. Therefore to move towards Order, we all need to man up. Order is Masculine and Chaos is Feminine. This proves there is a God who wants us to have Order. Most humans are complete bastards left to their own devices. And bingo! Here are my 12 Rules for Life.ġ Stand up straight with your shoulders straight Most lobsters are complete bastards left to their own devices. Pinkos and wishy-washy liberals had cornered the market in cod psychology, so I guessed there must be a huge hunger for a self-help book, backed up with religion, mythology, CAPITAL LETTERS and stating the obvious – one directed at responsible, socially minded conservatives craving some pseudointellectual ideology to prop up their beliefs. Then, with God’s help, I decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and develop my potential. Just a few years ago, I was an unknown professor writing academic books that nobody read.
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